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Joke of the Day

"I'll refrain from making any jokes about the Ashley Madison controversy... They're such an easy target, it might be considered cheating."

"Accidentally texted my dad ""have a hood day"" and he shot three people"

"I go to the gym so infrequently that I still call it the James."

"They're making a movie about the death of Steve Irwin Jamie Foxx will be playing Ray"

"INTERVIEWER: So, do you have any questions for me? ME: What's the Wi-Fi password? I: About the job M: What is the company Wi-fi password?"

"Me: I save a bunch of time by not having to tie my shoes. Her: What do you do with the time saved? Me: *tying my dogs shoes* Sorry, what?"

"What is Dracula's favorite fruit? Neck-tarines."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Blur ! Blur who ? Blur it's cold and wet out here !"

"Why don't klansmen like to eat sushi? because that would be a case of rice mixing"

"Me and my wife are like Catdog... Inseparable since birth."