213368

Joke of the Day

"[in ambulance after being shot] can we [coughs blood] stop at Taco Bell? ""Don't be stupid! [turns around while driving] of course we can"""

"You hear the joke about the frenzied mob? It's a riot."

"the opposite of a charles manson is a nicole kidman"

"Next time you see someone you don't like, begin conversation with ""I see the assassins have failed."""

"Fred: My mum's having a new baby. Drew: What's wrong with the old one?"

"Countries I can't believe Japan have not attacked: Wales"

"So I am a poet and a novelist challenges me to a fight... So I say ""Come at me, prose"""

"How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Cut the rope. Anyone else have good black jokes?"

"Zoo Keeper:""I've lost one of my elephants"" Other Zoo Keeper:""Why don't you put an advert in the paper?"" Zoo Keeper:""Don't be silly he can't read!"""

"Steve Jobs's death was a conspiracy. He was murdered by his brother, Inside Jobs."