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Joke of the Day

"Your Mother is like Communism... Shared by everyone."

"Why did the baker get smelly fingers? Because he needed a poo."

"Just shared w/ my son the amazing story of a boy who wanted to go to his friend's house & didn't get to go & yet everybody lived in the end."

"The official dance for my new mixtape has 3 steps... Stop, drop, and roll!"

"I USED VOLUME MAXIMIZING SHAMPOO THIS MORNING SO YES I DO HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM IN YOUR FACE OFFICER"

"Why don't ants go to church? Because they are insects."

"Even 9/11 had its positives... My house climbed 2 spots in the world's tallest building ranks."

"Just got a belly piercing. It's a mistletoe, I don't want any confusion on where I want your lips this Christmas."

"Two drivers crash into each other. They both finish writing their texts before getting out of their cars to inspect the damage"

"Any convenience store that requires the customer to wear pants isn't convenient at all."