223707

Joke of the Day

"Jimmy the NASCAR driver liked to masturbate during the race. He always came first, but finished last."

"How do you make a Welshman fall asleep? Ask him how much sex he's had in his lifetime."

"If you can't say anything nice about someone, then say it very vaguely and put it as your Facebook status"

"What did the Mooslim say to the Nazi? Don't you hate it when a few bad apples make us all look bad?"

"You left a note on the fridge saying ""This isn't working. Goodbye"" but I opened it and it was working perfectly well. I don't get it."

"Why couldn't the headless horseman win the race? He couldn't get a head."

"Where does the vampire deposit his savings? In the blood bank. And why did he like to deposit his savings there? Because everyone there helped increase his savings."

"What do you get if you cross a student and an alien ? Something from another universe -ity !"

"Why are C programmers poor? They don't have any inheritance. Or... Why should you not date a C programmer? They have no class."

"[at work] Carl, did you get naked when you used the bathroom? *standing there with his shirt & pants on backwards* ""No...why do you ask?"""