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Joke of the Day

"I'm quite lazy, so I use my toes to pick things up from the ground... ...You could say my feet come pretty handy."

"Elephant Hunter I used to hunt elephant but had to quit.. Carrying the decoys got to heavy."

"Whats the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? With the porcupine, the pricks are on the outside."

"""Just this one more episode."" you said, and all the voices in your head laughed and laughed, and slapped their knees."

"What's the hardest part of golf for asians? Driving"

"When your Dad is a math teacher you grow up with jokes like this... Q: Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip? A: To get to the same side!"

"When I was 16, I thought I could slam and lock my bedroom door in the house my parents paid for. So they took my door. That's 80s parenting."

"When someone is murdered, the police investigate the spouse first. And that tells you everything you need to know about marriage."

"What are mixed feelings? Watching your mother-in-law backing up towards the edge of a cliff in your new BMW."

"What did the perverted sauce say to the Chinese Ribs? .. I'm only Peking."