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Joke of the Day

"I'm pretty sure my electrician supports LGBT rights. Just the other day I heard him talking about his transister."

"There's a sign in this bathroom that asks us not to flush anything but toilet paper down the toilet & now I'm unsure how to proceed."

"""Stuff that alligator in that dolphin"" - God creating sharks"

"Nicknames How do you get bob from ""robert"" ? -no answer How do you get billy from ""william""? -no answer how do you get dick from ""richard""? -ask nicely"

"Birds that land and then WALK across the street... what the hell is wrong with you?"

"Why don't you feel the need to wear a seat belt when taking a cab? Because there is a doctor driving."

"My boss at Walmart said I have to stop Febreezing the homeless and that they aren't homeless, they're customers."

"Careers Advisor to American student: ""What do you want to be when you leave college?"" Student: ""Alive""."

"God: I need an Ark built. *Jesus lowers sunglasses* Jesus: I Noah guy."

"Hey, I fucked your mom last night. *Sigh* I know dad..."