211949

Joke of the Day

"What can a yakuza do for living when he doesn't want to hurt people? tattoo master"

"It's not that the man did not know how to juggle... ...he just didn't have the balls to do it."

"Ironically, I hate people who say ""like us on Facebook""."

"If I had a dollar for every time Hillary played the Woman Card ...I'd have $0.77 cents."

"What's the only type of seafood that Sean Connery won't share? Shelfish"

"Damn girl, are you an octagon? Cause there's like 8 different sides to you."

"Where's the best place to apologise to someone? Surrey."

"Me: ""This new flavour of Pringles is horrible."" Wife: ""You're eating a tube of tennis balls."""

"How many Apple users does it take to change a lightbulb? None. When the bulb goes, they just replace the house."

"Wife: ""You talk like some poorly written science fiction novel. I'm leaving you."" Me: ""I swear by the 12 moons of Bumtar I can change!"""