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Joke of the Day

"I am a woman . You are not supposed to know what's on my mind. For heaven's sake, I don't know what's on my mind."

"I'm fairly certain that most of us are one full gas tank away from bankruptcy."

"What's brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre"

"What's a Mexican's dick when it's cold out? A little chili."

"Humans: we're not like snakes Also Humans: mmmm eggs"

"[reading test results] ""It looks like you're gonna be just fine"" [nurse whispers in ear] ""Lol my bad u got like 6 weeks"" -Steve Harvey M.D."

"So I see your name is tiff I should hook you up with my friend gif, he's just like you only a little more animated"

"What do the twin towers and genders have in common? There used to be two."

"The guy that invented the heimlich maneuver died today... needless to say I'm a little choked up"

"What did the leper say the the prostitute? Keep the tip"