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Joke of the Day

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two, one to change it and one to tell her she did a really good job."

"Why was Fibonacci afraid of 5? ...because 5 8 13!"

"How did Jesus get those sexy messiah abs? He did crossfit."

"What did the carpet say to the floor? Don't move -- I've got you covered."

"I met a pirate the other day, whose parrot was saying, ""Pieces of seven! Pieces of seven!"" I said, ""Shouldn't that be pieces of eight?"" The pirate replied, ""Arrrrr, it's a parroty error."""

"(Don't do it, don't do it, don't do it.) Text: Hey what are you up to?"

"*knock* Who's... *knock* Who's... *knock knock* Who's there? *knock knock knock* Who... *knock knock knock knock knock* Piss off, Fibonacci!"

"Marry someone shorter than you so you can hide all the good snacks on the top shelf."

"An example of men's inability to understand women - Me: I have Nothing To Wear!! Him: Awesome!"

"Old Wang says to his friend Old Chen It is so sweet, you have been married 50 years and you still call your wife 'sweetheart'. What is your secret? Chen says, ""it is because I have forgotten her name"""