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Joke of the Day

"I met a pirate the other day, whose parrot was saying, ""Pieces of seven! Pieces of seven!"" I said, ""Shouldn't that be pieces of eight?"" The pirate replied, ""Arrrrr, it's a parroty error."""

Next Joke
 
"Randomly screaming and moaning in agony is a great way to get a seat by yourself on a packed bus."
"Tried to leave a voicemail for my mom but she picked up. I was forced to drop my phone into my purse and shake it around for 10 minutes"
"What kind of joke did the forgetful Redditor make?"
"What separates man from animal? Divorce."
"What happens when your scrotum touches the edge of the toilet bowl? Ebowla."
"My friend has Tourettes. He doesn't have a bank account. He has a swear jar."
"MAN TO LIZARD: ""SO I HEAR YOU'RE IN FLOORING SALES"" LIZARD: ""IM MORE IN PROMOTION"" MAN: ""WHAT DO YOU DO"" LIZARD: ""I REP TILE"""
"What do you call Bill O'Reilly? Ass seen on TV."
"What Do You Call a Bearded Man Whose Idea of Paradise is 72 Virgins? Richard Branson."