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Joke of the Day

"I met a pirate the other day, whose parrot was saying, ""Pieces of seven! Pieces of seven!"" I said, ""Shouldn't that be pieces of eight?"" The pirate replied, ""Arrrrr, it's a parroty error."""

Next Joke
 
"Actual Mechanical Advantage(AMA)"
"I've replaced my friends insulin with heroin. This is the most expensive prank I've ever done but it's ok, I'll rob him when he's dead."
"The best thing about telepathy is...I know, right?"
"trying to get through to Mozart on the Ouija board I really want him to listen to the Thong Song"
"So Helen Keller walks into a bar Then she walks into a table. Then she walks into a lamp. Then she walks into the wa- ok, you get the idea."
"Of course my clothes are on the floor. I'm a guy, that's where I hang them."
"What do you get when you cross a mad cow and an angry sheep? ...An animal in a very baaaaaaad mooooooood"
"I won the local hot dog eating contest and didn't even know I was competing."
"I was wearing a jean jacket yesterday and a little kid asked me why I made a jacket out of pants and I had no good answer for him"