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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a stoner with down syndrome? A baked potato."

"Vegetarian: 'You know, a cow died so you could have that burger'. Me: 'Maybe he died because you keep eating all of his food'."

"How do pirates agree with each other over long distances? With their aye-phones."

"What kind of couch do gay people buy? Homo-Sectionals"

"Me: come here often? Her: THIS IS MY BEDROOM IM CALLING THE COPS"

"What's brown and sticky. A stick."

"I lost fifty pounds... Unfortunately, I was in England at the time."

"Did you hear about the new Fairy BDSM book? Fifty Shades of Fae."

"What do you call a dating service for lumberjacks? Timbr"

"What a Chinese Restaurant Owner's Preferred License Plate? 888 MSG"