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Joke of the Day
"Eye jokes aren't funny They're really cornea."
Next Joke
"Your gene pool could use a little chlorine."
"What's a pirates favorite type of thread? Yaaaaarn."
"What do you call a fake psychic who was found out and now shoots up in ditches? A high medium low"
"What do you call a cellphone company that uses nuclear power? Cher-Mobile"
"""Should the cabin lose pressure oxygen masks will drop from the overhead area. Please place the bag over your own mouth and nose before assisting children or other adults acting like children."""
"Some lady on The Price is Right just won a brand new 2016 Epi-Pen."
"Guinea pigs aren't real pets. You buy them when your kids are begging for a dog, but you want to make them sad instead."
"90% of being a dad is yelling about doors being left open while the air conditioning is running."
"My girlfriend thinks I'm a gentleman for waiting for her to go inside before I drive away. When really I'm just letting out about 6 hours' worth of farts."