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Joke of the Day

"""They say there's no such thing as a free lunch. That ends today!"" -- me as I rally lunches everywhere to overthrow their oppressors"

"I would make a sexist joke But that would be wrong, and being wrong is for women."

"This o is out of cntext."

"I asked my friend if he knew binary he said ""yeah I took the 101 class"""

"Q: What does a blonde and a turtle have in common? A: If either one of them end up on there back they are both f*cked."

"I left my girlfriend because she lost an ear It may sound shallow but I take my corn seriously"

"Me: excuse me waitress, I ordered this filet medium-rare and it's clearly a peanut butter and jelly Wife: did you just call me ""waitress""?"

"in mexico, we don't say ""I love you"" cause we dont speak english."

"The worst racist joke I can think of. A black man and a parrot walk into a bar The Bartender says ""Wow what a beautiful bird where did you get it?"" The parrot reply's ""Africa"""

"Hey girl, why don't you treat me like a calculator... and give me them digits."