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Joke of the Day

"A sandwich walks into a bar The bartender looks at it and says, ""Sorry, we don't serve food here."""

"Why do tornadoes move so erratically? -They are dizzy"

"I, Ceasar, when I heard of the name... I, Ceasar, when I heard of the name Of Cleopatra, I straightaway laid claim. Ahead of my legions, she conquered my regions, I saw, I conquered, I came."

"I could've sworn there was less grunting and moaning the last time I put these pants on... Maybe the donut in my mouth muffled it"

"Did you hear about the fight in the bathroom? Shit went down"

"If you get nervous at a nude beach, just imagine everyone in their underwear."

"guy walks into a bar... bar eats 'im."

"Did you hear about the woman who had to quit her job as an air traffic controller to date a monk? She got out of the flying plans and into the friar."

"What's the definition of an african-american? Proof that skunks and monkeys fuck."

"dumbledore: our enchanted ceiling shows us wat the sky outside looks like mcgonagall: so...a magic glass ceiling dumbledore: [starts sweating]"