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Joke of the Day

"i spilled something on my sleeve but instead of trying to get the stain out i just rolled my sleeve up higher i can't wait to be an adult"

"What nationality are Sprinters? They Russian. I'll also see myself out."

"The internet is amazing One minute you're at work looking at random webpages; the next, you're at home looking for a new job"

"My ex-wife still misses me... ...but her aim is getting better!"

"Did you watch the movie constipation? It never came out."

"Hitler was born on April 20th... cuz he was destined to blaze the jews."

"50 condoms A guy at the convenience store asked the cashier for 50 condoms. Two girls in line behind him started snickering, so he turned around, looked them dead in the eyes, and said, ""Make it 52!"""

"I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already."

"Fucking in lifts is wrong on so many levels"

"What did the Calendar say to the Wall-clock the moment it became June 1st? ""I am dismayed!"""