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Joke of the Day
"Lucky that guy in Good Will Hunting liked apples."
Next Joke
"Batman: Life isn't a video game. Your actions have consequences *Robin writes 'I'm sorry I forgot to buy Charmin' 100 times on Batpaper*"
"I broke into and robbed a large shop in Ireland last week. I nearly got caught, the police had covered all the exits, so I escaped through the entrance."
"Q: How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator? A: Step one: Open the door. Step two: Put the elephant in. Step three: Close the door."
"Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers."
"Interviewer: It says here you're skilled at saying unexpected things? Me: Yes, I am. Interviewer: Hmm, I thought you were going to say something unexpec-- oh, you're good."
"Consciousness: That annoying time between naps."
"Two Irish couples decided to swap partners for the night. After 3 hours of amazing sex, Paddy says ""I wonder how the girls are getting on"""
"Who's the coolest guy in the hospital? The ultra-sound guy. [read next comment]"
"What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, lying in a ditch? Phil"