208617

Joke of the Day

"Dear Men. When a woman is upset, don't ask her what's wrong, but for fuck's sake don't not ask her what's wrong either. Hope this helps."

"Fruits are single-handedly keeping the sticker industry afloat."

"riddler: check out aquaman's new tweet: ""on my way to destroy the legion of doom with fam"" lex luthor: you follow aquaman? LOL others: LOL"

"What do you call a camel in a car? A camel auto!"

"Welcome to the jungle. My name is Axl Rose. I think you'll find we run a pretty good jungle here. There's the toilet *points everywhere*"

"What has four legs, and if it fell out of a tree it'd kill you? A pool table"

"My mom asked if i would stop singing Wonderwall by Oasis... I said ""Maybe""."

"Whenever I weigh myself, I always subtract 10 pounds. I don't think boobs, brains, and an ass this fabulous should count against me."

"Butterflies are like regular flies, but they live at Paula Deen's house."

"Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Do you know why I stopped? *silence* *a saxophone wails in the distance*"