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Joke of the Day
"""How about know"" -existentialist teen"
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"How did the detective solve his cold-case? He put it in a conviction-oven."
"Why are Indian the best in bed? They always come late."
"A child gets a toy Ferrari stuck in his belly button... ... it wouldn't be a problem if it was an Audi."
"All units be on the lookout, suspect is armed with hunky shoulders, soft eyes and dreamboat hair. I don't even remember what he did anymore."
"What is the difference between pick and choose? To pick is to make a selection... And choose are what Cubans wear on their feet."
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Carrie ! Carrie who ? Carrie me home I'm tired !"
"I just heard about it and I totally think I am... What if I'm a hypochondriac?"
"Can't be an atheist after getting in a subway car with no a/c because u now know hell is real"
"Some nights I wonder if the little boy from the sweatshop that made my iPhone is staring up at the same stars I'm Instagraming."