208031

Joke of the Day

"I thought of a great name for an abortion clinic... How about 'Birth Ctrl+Z' ?"

"I use a wheelchair. Whenever I'm at a job interview and they ask me what my greatest weakness is, I always want to say, ""Stairs""."

"The pope just pooped Holy shit"

"I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction."

"I like restaurants because the people have to be nice and feed you."

"What's the loneliest drink? I dunno but its in a solo cup."

"What did Melania Trump say after being stopped by an officer? License and registration, please."

"*calls mom* ""Ma I made 3 friends on twitter today"" *long pause* ""Mom?"" *mom stares at 3 fake twitter accounts she made, fights tears* ""Mom?"""

"How could you be pregnant!?!?!?!?! I bought he GOOD dollar store condoms!!!"

"What are the best clothes to wear to the dance club? Boots and pants and boots and pants and boots and pants..."