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Joke of the Day

"Bush vows to stabilise US economy"

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"What do you call an Irishman sitting on your front porch? Paddy O'Furniture"
"I bought a Lamborghini that tells dark jokes It goes from 0-100 real fast"
"The only good thing about being an alcoholic is that no one ever asks me to drive them anywhere."
"My father put a lot of pressure on me as a child. He used to say stuff like ""You're five years old? When I was your age I was six!"""
"My dad got fired for having sex with one of his patients the other day. Which is a shame because he was a really good vet."
"What's the difference between me and a calendar? A calendar has dates. #foreveralone"
"I like my women like I like my coffee I hate coffee."
"when I heard the news about Nintendo's president... it made my eye-wata"
"What's red and is bad for your teeth? A Brick."