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Joke of the Day

"Me: I'm way tougher than you. Wife: I gave birth twice without an epidural. Me: So? Wife: You called in sick for an ice cream headache."

"Its funny how chocolate can make your clothes shrink"

"My friend bored me when talking about Latin... they had discussed it ad nauseam."

"My friends say I'm condescending... That means I talk down to people."

"I read that 10 out of 2 people are dyslexic That makes two of us"

"I would never get a minivan because I can't even think of 7 people I'd want to be stuck in a vehicle with."

"I think my scale is broken. It only ever goes up."

"Just bought Cluedo: Gang Rape edition. Turns out they all did it."

"Q: What did one coffin say to the other? A: Is that you coughin'?"

"Do you know the fat catholic woman? [OC] She has mass."