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Joke of the Day

"You'll never convince me people eat raisins for any other reason than by accident."

"I've heard that a support group has been started for writers who can only sell their work to Barnes & Noble It's called Authors without Borders"

"Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl go to the toilet? Because the P is silent."

"I told the cashier that her eyebrows were drawn too high I guess she didn't realize because she seemed pretty surprised."

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? You can't jelly it in her ass."

"Two wizards in a car were driving along and the police were chasing them for speeding. One said ""What are we going to do?"" The other replied ""Quick turn the car into a side street."""

"I'm sure wherever my dad is he's looking down on us. He's not dead, just very condescending."

"What do you call a Mexican who lost his car? Carlos!!"

"The baby gets furious when I try to undress him. He gets that from his mother."

"What did the chicken say before it crossed the road? I'll be Ba Ba Ba Baaach!"