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Joke of the Day
"Why does Santa have such a big sack? He only cums once a year"
Next Joke
"Do you know why you should never hire a communist employee? Because they only work in theory"
"Wife: for the last time buy a terrarium Me: [drops 7 lizards into my shirt] why they already have a home"
"What do you call going Doctor to Doctor... What do you call going Doctor to Doctor to figure out what your inflammatory bowel disease is called? A Game of Crohn's."
"It's crazy how everyone sleeps differently. I sleep on my side, my roommate sleeps on his back, and my ex sleeps with everyone."
"What did Santa Claus's wife say during a thunderstorm? 'Come and look at the rain dear.'"
"A little girl was next in line. 'My name's Curtain' she said. 'I hope your first name is not Agnate ?' 'No it's velvet !'"
"How did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate food before it was cool"
"Can't decide if I should start this laundry or fake my own death."
"A Japanese commander invites Darth Vader to dinner He asks him "" Will you be there tonight at 8 PM Lord Vader?"" Vader says "" I hope so commander, for your sake ""."