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Joke of the Day
"I used to think maths was useless but then one day I realised that decimals had a point"
Next Joke
"A dirty joke A pig rolled in the mud"
"[at funeral parlor with bereaved girlfriend] HER: You think these glass urns are a good idea? ME: Remains to be seen."
"What's wrong with the sentence ""Jack and Jill is playing in the field?"" Women should be first."
"What's a Jedi's favorite brand of vodka? Skyy. Only Sith deal in Absolut."
"[bedroom] Me getting out whipped cream: I've been waiting for this Gf: kinky, I like it Me already eating pie: what"
"Give a man a fish... Give a man a fish and he'll throw it out and go to McDonald's. Teach a man to fish, and nope, still McDonald's."
"""I think that kid's a robot"" What? ""Look at his mouth"" Relax they're just braces *backs away slowly* ""That's exactly what a robot would say"""
"Did you hear about the mutant that had a sex change? She's an Ex-Man"
"Of all the lies I tell, ""I was just kidding!"" is my favorite."