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Joke of the Day
"Why did the chickens cross the road? Because they were Turkish."
Next Joke
"Of all the stupid things the church makes people believe, leading everyone to believe they can and should sing is the absolute worst."
"If I'm ever captured as a spy, all they'd have to do to get me to talk is put my house slipper on the wrong foot."
"What did the Hand say to the Penis when they first met.... Nice to beat you!"
"How do barmen surf the web? On the Gin-ternet."
"Can we have a moment of silence for all the great tweets that never make it out of the shower..."
"Donald trump Yeah."
"""Wanna play the Rape Game?"" ""No"" ""That's the spirit"""
"[me, leaving a funeral] That was fantastic. Let's do this again sometime."
"What's the difference between a high-wire circus trapeze act and the Rockettes? One is a fantastic display of cunning stunts while the other is a fantastic display of stunning cunts"