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Joke of the Day
"How do you get Dick from Richard? You ask nicely."
Next Joke
"Why is there no Mexican olympics? Because everyone that can swim, run and jump is already across the border."
"When I see a kid on a leash I assume they were a dog turned into a kid by a witch & the owners have yet to figure out how to turn them back."
"My Voodoo doll would be a glazed ham wrapped in chicken feathers."
"PERSONALITY TEST: When you read an obit where someone passes away ""surrounded by family,"" do you picture murder, or suicide?"
"How to be rich for the rest of your life... Legally change your name to ""Rich"""
"The five years of life you gain by eating healthy are spent preparing healthy food."
"Second attempt How to survive in Russia in 21 century?"
"My iPhone just autocorrected ""everyone"" to ""wartime"". I'm not entirely sure what that means but I'm pretty sure we're all going to die."
"Sometimes, my secretary reminds me of my wife. I was unbuttoning her shirt the other day during our lunch break when she says ""Remember, you have a wife."""