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Joke of the Day

"Colleagues who feel the need to say ""You either love me or hate me!"" are oblivious to the fact that it's always the latter."

"Why did Dave Grohl buy such a tall house? He wanted to make sure he was getting the best, the best, the best, the best-a view."

"A lady that sat next to me on a plane freaked out when she realized that I am a muslim. I laughed so hard my grenades nearly fell out of my pockets."

"What's a Russian's favorite service provider? Sprint."

"I've spent 50% of my life learning how to live without drugs and alcohol and the other 50% happy."

"Why don't you ever see any Muslim methheads? They all just get stoned instead."

"Symptoms of mental illness: -Hearing voices -Hallucinating -Complaining about how other people use their social media accounts"

"Barack and George walked into the White House... Hillary Dodged."

"What do Mexicans use to cut pizza? Little Caesars."

"Katrina Hit me hard, Wrecked my house, threw all of my possessions around and flooded my basement, But I still think those jeans made her look fat."