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Joke of the Day
"One does not simply talk to their pet in a normal voice....no they don't, oh no they don't."
Next Joke
"Why do noses run and feet smell?"
"Q: What has Clinton done that no one has been able to do in the last 5 years? A: Unite the Republican Party."
"As a mark of respect to Prince... The local pub is putting on a wake tomorrow night. All you can eat and drink for under 20 quid. I for one intend to party like it's 19.99."
"Starting a Mexican boy band named Juan Direction."
"Why was the little boy speaking gibberish? Because he lost his marbles."
"A cell's sister stepped on the cell's toe. ""Mitosis"""
"If the only way you say ""Happy Birthday"" to someone is via their Facebook wall, they're not your friend."
"I can cut a piece of wood in half just by looking at it. It's true, I saw it with my own eyes."
"Why do they never serve a beer at math party? Because you can't drink and derive"