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Joke of the Day
"Why was the church opposed to fire on torches? It was heat-on-a-stick."
Next Joke
"How do you defend your breath mints? Tic-Tactically."
"What sound does a bomb make before it goes off? allahu ackbar!!"
"I have a real super power of stopping bullets with my face... once."
"There are few problems in life that can't be sorted by slowing down, taking a deep breath, and THEN drawing winged eyeliner on a raccoon."
"To the cars honking behind me, Sorry I held up the drive thru line for 5 minutes counting to make sure I got all 50 of my McNuggets"
"Do you know the worst part about drinking bleach? It never gets pass the noose."
"I hate Russian Dolls They're so full of themselves."
"Imagine coming back to life as a zombie but someone tied your shoes together before you were buried."
"Who is the most hated actor in Saudi Arabia? Shia Labeouf"