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Joke of the Day

"What is the best tool for getting a handle on your gambling addiction? A vice grip."

"I'm quitting drinking for good. Now I drink for evil."

"What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dino-snore"

"choose one to drop: 1. acid 2. bass 3. out of college 4. the assault charges 5. that thun thun thun"

"Who is the most popular guy in the nudist colony? The one that can carry two cups of coffee and a dozen doughnuts at the same time. The most popular woman? The one that can eat the 12th doughnut."

"Alien: take me to your leader. Me: They all suck. How about I take you to this place I know where you can get amazing mini donuts?"

"I've got a good joke for you guys But you've probably all Reddit before... xD"

"It's black and hangs on a wire? A bad electrician!"

"I've got a new job in a biscuit factory. So far I've made a packet."

"You know why it's so difficult to put together a baseball team of egotists? Everyone wants to play first."