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Joke of the Day
"I'm quitting drinking for good. Now I drink for evil."
Next Joke
"Uh, excuse me, Mr. Swagger, Either walk a little faster or buy a belt. Thanks, homie."
"Doc, for all the good that suppository did me... I could have shoved it up my ass!"
"Me and Justin Trudeau have alot in common... We both hope our budget will balance itself"
"What did Thor say to the weaver fixing his cape? What are your Hemsworth?"
"I wish I had taught my dog the command ""Taylor Swift"" so every time it snowed he would just ""Shake It Off."""
"D'ya hear about the guy that drowned in a bowl of muesli? A currant pulled him under."
"Which phone is most sold in Australia? The htc M8. Oi mate"
"What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef. What do you call a cow with three legs? Lean Beef. What do you call a cow with two legs? YOUR MOMMA!"
"What did the one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing they just waved! Did you sea what I did there? I'm shore you did, beach."