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Joke of the Day

"A man goes to a doctor with a large, dirty toad on his head. The doctor asks, ""What seems to be the problem?"" And the toad replies, ""Hey, Doc, there's something stuck to my ass."""

"So, two elephants are in a bathtub, when one of them says, ""pass the soap"", and the other one says, ""No soap: Radio!"""

"""Doctor, Doctor... I've had diarrhea for 3 days, and I think it might be hereditary"" ""Hereditary? What makes you think it's hereditary?"" ""It's in my jeans"""

"Here's a quick joke for all you telepathic people out there."

"Advice to those who steal from libraries If someone gets caught stealing from a library, would they get *booked?*"

"Sometimes I pretend my hoodie sleeves are elephant trunks. My vote counts just as much as yours"

"Did you hear about the guy who swam the English Channel with no arms or legs? They call him... *'clever dick!'*"

"Relationship are like algebra... Do you ever look at your X and wonder Y?"

"For the next two days you can call me Edward... I'll be snowed in"

"""Surely EVERYONE pisses in the shower?"" I protest as I'm dragged out of Ikea"