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Joke of the Day

"Lawyer Joke :) What's the difference between a Lawyer & a Hooker? A hooker quits screwing you when you're dead :)"

"When I call a family meeting I turn off the house wifi and wait for them all to come running."

"I hate when the whole Internet mourns someone's death & I have to Google them to find out if they were a politician, an athlete or a Muppet."

"What did Kanye West say when he saw the Red Wedding episode of Game of Thrones? Dat shit Frey."

"I made a company that disguises land mines as prayer mats... Prophets are through the roof"

"Build a fire for a man and he will be warm for a night... Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life."

"I think I might be a wizard... every time I push open a door it becomes ajar."

"What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call it, it's not going to come."

"Why did the University of Oklahoma researcher stay awake every night? He was trying to find a cure for insomnia."

"Michael Bay looks like if cocaine was a person."