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Joke of the Day

"TBT - What's the difference between Bill Clinton and a screwdriver? One turns in screws, one screws interns."

"Kid's Choice Awards are a great reminder why children aren't allowed to vote."

"if you're stuck in a group text, an easy way out is to throw your phone in the street and start a new life"

"Genie: I'll give you more wishes, I feel bad for you Me: [with 3 ice cream cones on the ground] That's very nice of you"

"What's the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scottish farmer? Mick Jagger sings ""eh you, get offa mai cloud"", but the Scottish farmer says ""eh McLeod, get offa mai ewe!"

"I hate sitting comfortably on the couch and then discovering my phone is more than an arm's length away. Also more than a leg's length away."

"If you ever see anyone doing a crossword... ...tap them on the shoulder and whisper ""7 up is lemonade""."

"Twitter is the world's largest voluntary police lineup."

"Why are black man's palms white? Because they are always leaning against cop cars."

"Why don't nervous vegans visit Germany? They fear the wurst!"