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Joke of the Day
"I would tell a broken pencil joke.. But there's no point."
Next Joke
"You're right, sir. It's MY fault that your credit card was declined. Please, tell me again how much money you have in that account."
"What did the beaver say to the tree? [It's been nice 'gnawing' you!](#s)"
"KIDNAPPER: [on phone] I'm holding your son for ransom. DAD: I have no money, what's the ransom? KIDNAPPER: Bring me one rich kid."
"What's the difference between a bird and a fly? A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird"
"Lost my car keys so I'm forcing the guy at Home Depot to make me new ones based on what I remember about them."
"Whenever someone says ""Let's kill two birds with one stone"", I wonder what they did wrong. Probably some kind of religious violation."
"How do you keep an imbecile happy all his life ? Tell him a joke when he's a baby !"
"Do you know why scuba divers roll backwards off boats? Because if they rolled forward they would just go into the boat"
"what idiot called it a fly swatter and not a splatula?"