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Joke of the Day

"A giraffes' tongue is 18 inches long. Good thing it's not 12 inches long. Otherwise, it would be a foot."

"I want to die like my grandpa, peaceful and in his sleep. Not screaming and terrified, like the passengers in his car."

"The weather and a pussy are similar in one regards When it starts to get wet, it is time get inside."

"How do you know when your wife is having an orgasm? when you come home from work and see my car in your driveway....."

"Why is it so hard to break up with a Japanese girl? You have to drop the bomb twice."

"Did you hear about the nun that bites her nails? You can say she has a bad habit."

"Why is there an eject button on the DVD remote? You still have to get up & take the disc out. It's like having a remote to open the fridge."

"Why do chicken coops only have 2 doors? If they had 4 it would be a chicken sedan."

"[OC] How does Haskell like his food? Curried."

"Hillary says it's time to have a woman in the Oval Office. Bill says - been there, done that ..."