203099

Joke of the Day

"Being molested by a teacher is twice as bad for home-schooled kids."

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"A Linux sysadmin walks into a pharmacy. ""ephedrine?"" ""I can't serve you that"" ""sudoephedrine"" ""There you go""."
"If you were to second guess your decision on booking a trip to a Native American community... That would be a reservation reservation reservation!"
"PEOPLE OF THE PLANE LISTEN TO ME WHEN THE SEATBELT LIGHT GOES OFF STAND UP IMMEDIATELY OR YOUR SPOT IN THE NON-MOVING LINE WON'T BE ASSURED"
"What's Christmas called in England ? Yule Britannia !"
"What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? A boy scout comes home from camp."
"Helpful weight loss tip: Don't eat so much, you fat piece of shit."
"Dude just knocked on my door... selling raffle tickets for black orphans, I said fuck that, with my luck I'd probably win one."
"Why can't steven hawking perform comedy? He can't do stand up"
"Doing LEGO with my son is like assisting during surgery. 6yo: Flat gray piece. Me: Here. 6: 5 square red blocks. M: Here. 6: I said RED!"