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Joke of the Day

"Why did the Snowman pull his pants down? Because the snowblower was coming."

"I've been using Vim for 5 years... Mainly because I don't know how to exit it"

"What is logic? A mute telling a deaf guy that a blind guy saw a paraplegic running behind a bald guy while grabbing his hair."

"[date] Clark Kent: I propose a toast *they take their glasses off the table* Lois Lane: omg it's Supertable!"

"I love October because it signals the change from eating tacos outside season to eating tacos inside season."

"Wife: Are you coming or not? Me: Is there gonna be alcohol? Wife: It's your grandmother's funeral! M:... Wife: NO! Me: Then I'm not coming."

"Steven Hawking came back from his first date in 10 years. His Glasses were smashed, he had a broken wrist, twisted ankle and grazed knees. Apparently she stood him up."

"if i told you you have a beautiful body.... would you hold it against me?"

"Bury it... ...it's my dad's 'dead joke'."

"Black people can be racist too It's just that white people are so much better at it."