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Joke of the Day

"[1st date] ""My birthday is on April 20th, so 4/20. Isn't that cool? When's yours?"" Oh, umm *sweating* Sextember 69th"

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"What do you call bug mating? INSEX"
"I bet the guy who invented fake dog shit was upset the name ""shampoo"" was taken"
"Attachment isn't when 2 ppl chat night and day. When someone emails u and adds an image or data file with it, THAT FILE IS CALLED ATTACHMENT"
"I'm so old I remember when teens getting pregnant meant ""PANIC!"" not ""Congratulations, you get your own MTV show!"""
"I run from my car all the way to the front door of McDonald's because fitness is a lifestyle"
"Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple."
"Why don't Junior League debutantes engage in group sex? Too many thank you notes to write afterwards."
"How do we know that Jesus wasn't born in Mexico? Because he'd never have been able to find 3 wise men and a virgin."
"DMX is in jail Because X didn't give it to them."