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Joke of the Day

"Apple more profitable than Samsung still in 2015 Guess you could say they definitely out cell the competition."

"Why do Polish people's names end in 'ski'? Because they can't spell toboggan."

"I know a really good knock knock joke! However someone else has to start it"

"Him: This house is perfect for us! Her: What about the kids? Him: You're right. We'll have to put them up for adoption"

"Why was Jon walking backwards on the first day of school? Everyone kept saying it was back to school time."

"Hating people takes too much energy. I just pretend they're dead."

"Left handed people in the past. Why did people back in the day not accept left handed people? Because it wasn't right. I'm sorry bye."

"My kids can't hear the dog barking for 15mins to come back inside but they can hear me bite into a Pop-Tart from 3 counties away."

"What do you call nondeterministically scrambled Crunk? White and black noise."

"In Soviet Rusia: In soviet rusia, we post webs on the cat!"