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Joke of the Day

"This coffee shop is so crowded I accidentally started working on someone else's screenplay."

"SCIENCE FACT: if you took all of the veins from your body and laid them end to end, you would die."

"Never date a girl with lots of baggage They'll travel too much, you will never get to see them."

"What is Aloe Blacc's real name? Bye Bye White"

"What do you say to a bunch of worried Trump supporters? ""Don't worry, everything is going to be alt-right."""

"What do you call a Zoo that contains only small dogs? A Shitzu."

"Every fight is a food fight when you're a cannibal."

"Why are 9/11 victims the best readers? They can go through 94 stories in seconds!"

"What manner of evil contract with the devil must I enter into so I can get eye drops INTO my eyes?"

"After a long and distinguished career, my French teacher finally retired. Adios, amigo."