202320

Joke of the Day

"Q: Why do bagpipers walk when they play? A: To get away from the noise."

"I saved $38 by moving the fish tank in front of the TV during ""Ellen"" and telling my kids it was Finding Dory."

"Don't you sometimes wish that you could just click like' on someone's like'?"

"Dentist: How often do you floss? Dracula: Every day Dentist: Your gums are covered in blood. Dracula: Oh...I mean never. I never floss."

"""wow these chicken wings are SPICY"" i say aloud to no one, the world ended years ago. i'm not even eating wings. even the sun has gone"

"Coworker came back into the office after being out sick for one day. Me: Feeling better? Him: Yea, I had a bad case of Ass Glaucoma. Me: What? Him: Yea! I couldn't see my ass being drug to work!"

"Zootopia It'll either make your kid more tolerant or turn them into a furry."

"Did you hear about the man who got sick at the airport? It was a terminal illness."

"A Scottish man walks store... He asked for 15 litres of the best whiskey the clerk has. ""Did you bring a container for this?"" The clerk asks. ""You're speaking to it."""

"What's the quickest way to lose pounds? The UK National Lottery!"