201934

Joke of the Day

"Someone on my street has taken up the clarinet, which has inspired me to take up the sniper rifle..."

"Why did George Washington leave office after his second term. He wanted to set a president."

"What's black white and red all over Michael Jackson in a blender."

"If I ever shot the sheriff, I'd probably go ahead and shoot the deputy too. Along with any other witnesses, because at that point why not."

"I would rather weave a suit out of my grandfather's pubic hair than ""pull an all-nighter"" with you."

"Why do people make fun of me because I've never grabbed a girl's boobs? I still don't get tit."

"I'm the daughter of Ned Stark! Arya?"

"Picking up this tiny piece of paper would take 1 second but instead I'm going to run over it 100 times with the vacuum at different angles."

"How do you make a rabbit stew? Keep it waiting."

"An alarm clock that texts your boss for you the fifth time you press snooze"