201863

Joke of the Day

"I held the door open for a Japanese woman today and she said, ""sank you."" Pretty fucked up for her to bring up Pearl Harbor like that."

Next Joke
 
"How do you get gum out of hair? cancer -I'm sorry-"
"So, what're all of us fortunate people complaining about today?"
"When in Rome... Crucify Jesus"
"One day I bet bullets will be replaced by flowers, and guns will probably be replaced by something that fires flowers with deadly force."
"When I was in college, I used to have sex almost EVERY DAY... ...almost Monday, almost Tuesday, almost Wednesday..."
"As a kid my mom laughed at me because I was always worrying about being shot with a crossbow while on the toilet. Well who's laughing now?"
"What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute? Your job still sucks"
"My lesbian neighbors asked me what I wanted for Chirstmas and I got a Rolex. I guess they miss-understood when I said ""I wanna watch""."
"What's the best part of dating a quadriplegic? Spinning her like a top when she rides you cowboy style."
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