201232
Joke of the Day
"NSFW What do you get when you stab a toddler with a pair of scissors? An erection."
Next Joke
"What's Shakespeare's favorite video game? Sonnet the hedgehog"
"So now i hear donald trump wants to put auto gun turrets on his wall I say, do the coastlines too. Keep out those merpeople!"
"Sometimes, late at night, I stare out the window at the stars and think about all the airlines that have wronged me..."
"""A Bunch of Stuff I Remembered and Then Compiled into a Narratively Cohesive Yet Inconsistently Compelling Tome: A Memoir"""
"What do you call a cat that's guilty of infidelity? A cheetah"
"God: done? Noah: yea G: whats this Noah proudly: a swing set G: u built a park. I asked for an ark N: a what? G: a boat N: say boat then"
"So, Helena Bonham Carter and Tim Burton have split up! It's a bit of a Nightmare before Christmas."
"I wanted to eat Nicki Minaj's sugary sweet ass like a cupcake... But all I got was an anal cavity :("
"Donald Trump is so narcissistic... When he looks in the mirror, his pupils dilate"