201070
Joke of the Day
"unlike drugs, twitter addiction won't cost you anything, except your social life"
Next Joke
 
"My wife said she wants a divorce for valentines day. I wasn't planning to spend that much.."
"Your head is sooooo bald I mistook you for a green rabbit."
"Pistorius won't have trouble finding his feet when they jail him, they will be kept in a box next to the door"
"Despite what everyone says, I don't think your mom is a ""dirty pirate whore"". She's actually quite clean for a pirate whore."
"If someone asks what you do for a living and you reply ""I'm a lunatic"" they won't ask any more questions."
"What do you tell a girl with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice."
"I think about other women when I'm having sex with my wife. But I always think about her when I'm having sex with other women."
"I always carry a mushroom with me, just in case my enemy shows up & I need something to make me bigger."
"My wife: ever since you got on twitter you never listen or talk to me any more. Me: yeah spaghetti for sure!"