200718

Joke of the Day

"Someone blew up a department store because they didn't stock basic clothing... There were no casual tees."

"We're decorating the tree with the kids today. But now that they're teens it's harder to find branches that will support their weight."

"Charles Dickens' book on wine making, Grape Expectations."

"I just sent a text that says ""we really need to talk"" to everyone I know so nobody will bother me today."

"*two turtles strapping themselves to a sleeping cheetah* Just you wait, Carl! This is gonna be awesome!"

"I like my women how I like my wine 12 years old and locked in the cellar"

"""Last Airbender"" got a 6% on 'Rotten Tomatoes.' Do you know how bad a film has to be to get below 15%? ""2 Girls 1 Cup"" got an 18%."

"What is the difference between American teen girls and Muslim teen girls? American teenage girls get stoned BEFORE they have sex."

"*reads a note sombody put on my desk* [i heard u caught a cold! i hope it FLU away!] *drops note* what.. WAT IS THIS SOME SORT OF SICK JOKE"

"When Fnatic plays on fy_snow... OLAFmeister gets an ace"