200385

Joke of the Day

"I tried to teach my grandma how to eat noodles with chopsticks She accidentally made a sweater."

"How does it feel to be out of coffee? Depresso."

"What did the tailor say after a job well done? There is nothing left too loose."

"Welcome to the jungle. My name is Axl Rose. I think you'll find we run a pretty good jungle here. There's the toilet *points everywhere*"

"Why is Stephen Hawking going to hell? Because it's a stairway to heaven, not a ramp."

"Using a cellphone in 90's: ""he's prob a drug dealer"" Using a payphone today: ""he's prob a drug dealer"""

"So are we all just going to pretend that we didn't spend 2001 yelling, ""Whassup?"" at each other?"

"Why would America make the bald eagle its national bird when all they do is attack things and fly away and nevermind I think I get it now."

"Birdwatching by Jack Daw"

"What do you call a snake that's 3.14 metres long? A thon"