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Joke of the Day

"I'm pretty sure if Flo from Progressive and Jake from State Farm hooked up, the universe would explode."

"Everyone has something they do after sex like taking a shower. I just get out of my uncles car, and cry all the way home."

"Why did Mubarak and Gaddafi get dehydrated? They didn't want water from the Arab Spring."

"""Wow, I haven't showered since last year!"" ""Haha good one, but it's not the new year yet"" ""I know..."""

"Did you know diarrhea is hereditary? Cause it runs in your jeans."

"Have you guys heard of the joke about the electric chair? It's shocking."

"""Oh my god, you've gotten so fat! Want me to make you something to eat?"" - my mother"

"Like most people my age, I'm 23. ."

"""Strap On"" backwards is ""No Parts"""

"Taking to people about your child abuse experience is the toughest part. The last time i did it, i had to spend 7 years in jail."