200124

Joke of the Day

"Why I dislike German sausages. They are the wurst."

"Since I started my diet my pants are two sizes too big! Granted I just bought a bunch of pants that are two sizes too big."

"Why did the French Hen give up her job? One day she'd just had un uf."

"What do you call an incredibly flexible chicken with an alien wristwatch? Bent Hen."

"Where does a Sith Lord do their shopping? The Maul."

"Yelling someone's name in different voices until they finally hear you"

"What's the difference between a women's track team and a tribe of pygmys? One is a cunning bunch of runts..."

"Why were the people in the Twin Towers so upset about their pizza order? They ordered pepperoni but all they got was plane."

"Cop: You doin drugs? ""No"" Cop: Whatya smokin? ""Pot"" Cop: THATS DOING DRUGS ""Ohh I thought you meant like [whispers] having sex with drugs"""

"Why were all the oompa loompas black in Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory? Because Orange is the New Black."